Commonwealth commentary

Over the past couple of days I’ve discovered the perfect excuse to watch the Commonwealth Games. The swimming commentators are just something else. I don’t think they’re household names. I certainly don’t know them anyway. But their banter — which mostly seems to be about hair — is legendary! They’re like a couple of old ladies. Two examples, which I have paraphrased here, stick in my mind.

Commentator A: Look at that chest hair.
Commentator B: It’s like a carpet!

Commentator A: Look at those… well, er — how do you say this? …Look at those buttocks!
Commentator B: You shouldn’t be looking!

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