I have got news for you

Not only is this the season of giving, goodwill and all sorts of cheery things like that, but it’s also the season of disappointing television. You’d think that as it’s disappointing every year, expectations for Christmas television would be extraordinarily low. Yet we never learn our lesson, and it never ceases to be disappointing. How does that happen?

Anyway, I’m going to moan about two television programmes which have gone right downhill recently.

Dead Ringers
I must have missed something. Surely it should be ‘Deaf Ringers’ or something, because whenever I watch this programme these days I spend half of the episode trying to work out who they’re supposed to be doing an impression of. Some of Jon Culshaw’s ones are good; some of them are pretty dire though. And for some reason Jan Ravens gives all the people who are supposed to come across as bimbos a northern accent. Because of course all bimbos come from the north of England.

Have I got News for You
I stopped watching this a couple of years ago, partly because it clashes with my favourite radio programme, but mainly because it has become one of the most predictable television programmes I’ve ever seen. You know the story. Paul Merton will do something “hilarious” “off the cuff” like wearing a silly hat, or jumping into a bumbling soliloquy about how stars are made of towels, or something equally “surreal”. On the other side, Ian Hislop will declare or imply that the world has gone mad an average of 4.7 times per episode. All the while, all four contestants will spend their whole time taking the piss out of the presenter – especially if it’s a politician – but unless it’s a fellow Godlike comedian. Considring they threw Angus Deayton overboard fearing that he’d become the butt of all jokes, bringing in a bunch of politicians (who, incidentally, couldn’t present a television programme if their lives depended on it) to replace him isn’t exactly the clever option.

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